‘If a man has sexual relations with a man as one does with a woman, both of them have done what is detestable. They are to be put to death; their blood will be on their own heads’ (Leviticus 20:13, NIV).
‘Or do you not know that wrongdoers will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived... men who have sex with men... [will not] inherit the kingdom of God’ (1 Corinthians 6:9-10, NIV).
There are five passages in the Bible where sex between people of the same biological sex is specifically prohibited.1 You can see in the two examples above that the language is pretty strong. As someone who experiences same-sex attraction, you might expect me to struggle with the language here – perhaps to wish it was toned down. But in fact, I’m grateful that it’s as strong as it is.
The benefit of strong language
As a 16-year-old church girl who was dating another 16-year-old church girl, I was keen to understand what the Bible said about same-sex relationships.
I was left with a very clear, very stark picture. I found that so helpful.
I remember finding a chapter about homosexuality in a book covering lots of tough questions about Christianity. I dutifully looked up the Bible references mentioned in that chapter, and there in black and white, I found unequivocal statements that my sexual same-sex relationship was wrong. I remember a lingering hope as I flicked from the Old Testament to the New – the things I'd read in Leviticus used very male-centric language. Perhaps this didn’t apply to me, somehow? Perhaps things were different for men and women? But then Romans 1 blew that theory out of the water, and I was left with a very clear, very stark picture. I could choose to follow Jesus, or I could choose to continue my sexual relationship with my girlfriend. I could not do both.
I found that so helpful.
It was hard to hear, of course, and hard to process and accept. In many ways, 17 years on from picking up that tough questions book, I’m still processing and accepting it. But I’m so grateful that God didn’t mince his words on this. He wasn’t vague, or evasive, or apologetically ambiguous. And that meant that at 16, I knew immediately where I stood. I had complete clarity on the choice before me. It’s a choice that was hard to make, but it would have been a thousand times harder if I’d had doubts about what God was actually saying about same-sex relationships.
Put it in context
Lest we think that God is particularly harsh about gay sex, let’s remember that he uses strong language on many other occasions. Here’s the sentence just before that Leviticus 20 prohibition:
‘If a man has sexual relations with his daughter-in-law, both of them are to be put to death. What they have done is a perversion; their blood will be on their own heads’ (Leviticus 20:12, NIV).
Notice how similar this language is?
And here’s that 1 Corinthians 6 passage in full:
‘Or do you not know that wrongdoers will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor men who have sex with men nor thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards nor slanderers nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God’ (1 Corinthians 6:9-10, NIV).
God doesn’t use strong language about same-sex sexual relationships. He uses strong language about sin.
Sin is distortion. It is damage that cripples us, a disease eating away at us. God hates sin. He is pure and perfect and exquisitely beautiful, and sin cannot come close to him. But God loves us.
In Jesus, God has gloriously, sacrificially made a way for us to be free from sin. It’s a freedom that we will one day know in full, in the spotless new creation where we will be with God forever. But in this life, we have to choose to pursue that freedom by saying no to sin and yes to Jesus, day by day.
To do that, we need to be clear on what sin is. But we’re really bad at that. While we’re waiting for the new creation, our hearts are still disordered and confused, our perceptions still so limited. And so God makes clear to us what sin is, the deadliness of its consequences, and the drastic actions that we must take to avoid sin and pursue holiness. One way he brings that clarity is by using strong, shocking language to make us sit up and take notice.
Isn’t it kind of him to do that?
Even stronger language
But sin isn’t the only thing that God uses strong language about. Far from it:
‘Jerusalem, Jerusalem ... how often I have longed to gather your children together, as a hen gathers her chicks under her wings’ (Matthew 23:37, NIV).
‘How can I give you up, O Ephraim? How can I hand you over, O Israel? ... My heart recoils within me; my compassion grows warm and tender’ (Hosea 11:8, ESV).
‘For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his love for those who fear him; as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us’ (Psalm 103:11-12, NIV).
‘I will make you my wife forever, showing you righteousness and justice, unfailing love and compassion. I will be faithful to you and make you mine, and you will finally know me as the LORD’ (Hosea 2:19-20, NLT).
Even stronger than his language about sin is the language that God uses when he talks about his love for us.
God uses strong language to get his point across. That language made it clear to me that I had to choose between him and a same-sex relationship. But it was matched, even outweighed, by his strong language making clear that his love for me is without limit, that a life with him is beyond compare, and that to be with him is the only thing that will truly satisfy the longings of my heart.
- You’ll find these in Leviticus 18, Leviticus 20, Romans 1, 1 Corinthians 6, and 1 Timothy 1.
Some would argue that Genesis 19 should also be included in this list, but it’s an unhelpful passage to include in conversations about loving, monogamous sexual relationships. For more on this see Preston Sprinkle, Living in a Gray World: A Christian Teen’s Guide to Understanding Homosexuality (Zondervan, 2015), pp.43-45, or Rebecca McLaughlin, Does the Bible Affirm Same-Sex Relationships?: Examining 10 Claims about Scripture and Sexuality (The Good Book Company, 2024), pp.33-38.
